1. Would They Rename the Coyotes?
There’s a lot of buzz this week about the NHL possibly moving the Coyotes to Salt Lake City. Where’s the buzz coming from? Reports that the NHL is building a second schedule for next year, one in which the Coyotes are in Salt Lake City. Just in case!
If the Coyotes do move to Salt Lake City, I would like to be involved in naming them. Some suggestions:
- Coyotes: Sticks with the tradition of keeping a team’s name when it moves to Salt Lake City.
- K-Pop: Sticks with the tradition of naming Utah teams after musical genres not native to Utah.
- Steamrollers: A very cool nickname.
- Pioneers: A nod to Utah’s roots.
- Beards: A nod to Utah’s locals.
- Rangers: There are a lot of national parks in Utah, and I think having two teams in one league named the same thing sounds fun.
- Beekeepers: This would make Weber State feel so dumb.
- Perseus: If you want a good rivalry with Seattle…
2. Aaron Rodgers Said Things
In a hilarious move, Mike Florio (author of a mob novel set in 1973, I’m currently seeing on his website) took some Aaron Rodgers quotes from a podcast nobody’s heard of and widely publicized them in what was ostensibly an attempt to refute them. Surely, Florio’s aggressive partisan response calmed everybody’s temperature on these comments nobody would have otherwise encountered.
Specifically, Florio wanted to relitigate Rodgers’s alleged comments on Sandy Hook from eleven years ago, denounce concerns that Joe Biden is really old, and make clear that JFK Jr. was not running for the Senate at the time of his death. I appreciated the third part of it. I probably would’ve taken Rodgers’s word for it, had it somehow made its way to my ears.
The quotes by Rodgers are, of course, really Aaron Rodgers (I’m taking them from Florio’s work; I’m not going to find that podcast):
“So Bobby loses his uncle, JFK, his father, RFK. His cousin dies in a plane crash when he was running against Hillary Clinton. I’m not saying this was a conspiracy, but it’s kind of a weird coincidence. Bobby’s in danger, you know? Like he’s putting himself on the line. Why? Because he fucking believes in this country.”
“They’re terrified. They’re terrified of people that think for themselves that aren’t controlled. I’m not beholden to anybody. I have a contract. I can get cut at any point. I have very few sponsors now. They’re all people that I really believe in and there’s some sort of equity investment in it. But I’m not controlled. Nobody controls my messaging.”
“The country’s in a bad place and it’s not going to get better with Weekend at Bernie’s, who can barely put a sentence together, if that’s even him. It’s not going to get better I don’t think with Mr. Trump, Mr. President Trump, who had four years to do it and kept Anthony Fauci in charge.”
Just hilarious stuff all around. “If that’s even him” cracked me up. “But it’s kind of a weird coincidence” cracked me up. “Bobby’s in danger” cracked me up. Also so Aaron Rodgers to share that he has equity in his sponsors.
I want the political discourse to improve in this country and for there to be fewer kooks in politics. Not only because it would be good for all of us, but because it would make Aaron Rodgers even more entertaining. Imaging Troy Aikman going off like this in 1999.
3. Happy Joe Kelly Anniversary
Six years ago tonight, Joe Kelly beat up Tyler Austin. We knew of him before that happened, but this started our love affair with the reliever. Here’s our post from the time, for those looking to go back down memory lane.
