Ok, so we’ve been talking a bit on here about how Memphis can’t get itself a Power Five invite despite seemingly being a strong candidate for Power Five membership. The FedEx money seems to mean nothing. The success in football and men’s basketball seems to mean nothing. The location at the heart of the largest metropolitan statistical area between Oklahoma City and Nashville seems to mean nothing. Nobody wants to be in a league with Memphis except for teams trying to get into a league that’s too good for Memphis.
The takeaway here, of course, is that everyone’s scared of Memphis.
But not because of winning and losing.
Look, yes, Memphis wins a lot. They’re the current titleholders in the greatest tournament in the world. Their football program is competent. That’s intimidating. But it also gives you power. If you could be in a conference with an entity that just won every gold medal at the Olympics (the next-best thing to winning the NIT or winning the Europa League or getting that second waffle at Waffle House and not getting a tummy ache from it), you’d be in that conference. Wouldn’t matter if you were going to get dunked on the optimal number of times for them to repeat as NIT champions. You’d want to be in that league. This is why Texas and Oklahoma joined the SEC. Are they going to get beat up? Quite possibly. But it’s worth it.
No, the Big 12 and its compatriots aren’t scared of Memphis because of winning and losing.
The Big 12 and its compatriots are scared of Memphis because Memphis’s boosters are presumably murdering people.
Look. This is all alleged. This is all speculation. I don’t know if Memphis’s boosters are actually murdering people. *blanket disclaimer that absolves me from all legal responsibility* (bet you didn’t know you could just do that, OANN)
But I think they might be.
Why else would you stay away from Memphis if you were the Big 12? Do you love Disney? (Ok that one’s possible) Do you want West Virginia to have a natural rival so you can keep them in the fold? (Hmm alright that one too) Are you impressed with Houston’s development and enamored with their size and location in a massive, rapidly growing city? (Uh oh) Do you recognize BYU’s status as the athletic face of a growing, well-financed cultural minority with generations of fierce pride? (Shit this did not go well)
Obviously, Big 12 people (and other power conference people) are terrified of being involved in whatever scandal’s about to break at Memphis. And since UNC was literally doing the fake-classes thing and that one blew over, and since Baylor’s in this league and *gestures in the general direction of Baylor’s Wikipedia page*, it’s hard to know of anything that could scare short of an ongoing murder habit.
They’re killing people being closed doors over at Memphis.
Allegedly.
