I need to get these somewhere I can easily find them.
I was at the mall on Thursday, visiting the watch store (which is a story for another time), and within two minutes of entering I saw three separate people eating ice cream cones. Not little ones, either. Big, proud waffle cones. My plans changed. Time could wait—I was going to get ice cream.
I mentioned this to my friends, later, and by friends I mean everyone who reads my tweets. If you don’t read my tweets, it’s not that you’re not my friend, but if you do? Sorry. We’re pals.
I thought I’d found the glitch in the matrix. I thought I’d uncovered the thing that would point out once and for all that this world cannot be what it purports to be. Then, my friend explained:
It’s cups! Makes perfect sense. And honestly? Probably a good thing. Cups aren’t as fun as ice cream cones, but they do still get you ice cream, which is great, and they also don’t continue the string of ice cream cone contagion. Someone needs to break the line. It would be quite a way to go, but extinction by ice cream would ultimately be a bad thing for the human race.
Anyway, ice cream cones: They’re just like the little handouts NIT fans bring to the NCA* *********t’s “Final Four.” Once someone takes one, everyone keeps taking one. Once someone declines, everyone declines. We are lemmings! Which brings me back to the matrix…
