Here we are, friends. It’s Monday. You’re sitting there, looking back on this weekend, and you’re thinking:
How did Burnley do and also how did the Auto Club 400 turn out?
Enter: me (you see I didn’t say “enter me” right there because that seemed unnecessarily provocative and it is also not at all what I mean—not that I have any problem with those who do mean that when they say it, I just don’t mean that, which, again, is why I put the colon in there).
Burnley
Not a lot happened. Which was fine. Getting out of Newcastle (*double checks that they played Newcastle*) with a point (it was a scoreless draw, no fun VAR hijinks this time) was enough for Britain’s team this week. Got a visit from Tottenham Saturday, or as I call them, Cottonham, because they’re soft. We’ll have more on the matchup later this week (editor’s note: we can’t promise you that) but know this: these guys played three months ago Saturday as well, and—actually, let’s just ignore that part. First matchup of 2020 between the two.
NASCAR
Jimmie Johnson did not win, nor did he stomp all over the track. Real classy guy, that Jimmie Johnson. Alex Bowman won—you may remember him from last week, when he nearly won. It looked like it was going to rain, and even did rain at times, but the track stayed dry enough to avoid what the haters are calling a “Full Daytona.” Also, Martin Truex Jr. had some good soundbites:
Anyway, love the “Ten-Four” by the spotter, but overall, nothing too special this week. Just good, clean fun, and Bowman’s going to his third straight playoff appearance (for those scoring at home, that’s him, Denny Hamlin, and Joey Logano who are all locked in now—none of whom are surprises) (for those at home wondering what happens if every race has a different winner, that probably won’t happen, but maybe it’s possible? not sure, we’ll keep an eye on it).
Next up: Phoenix.
