Well, friends, we have some news.
We’re going to be doing another bracket.
In the middle of this one!
I know, I know. This is reckless. Possibly crazed. But we put ourselves in a calendaric bind, and we are all nothing if not slaves to time.
What’s going on is that I Think You Should Leave, the best sketch show on Netflix, is releasing its third season on Tuesday, May 30th, so that one day after remembering all our dead soldiers we can all laugh at things right now we cannot even comprehend because Tim Robinson hasn’t introduced them to us yet.
Now, we know not all of you have seen I Think You Should Leave. This is fair and completely ok, and it makes it work well that we’re doing the ITYSL bracket in the middle of The Biggest Weirdo. The plan is to alternate days, doing voting for ITYSL and then weirdo voting, with occasionally back-to-back days of one or the other. If you don’t know ITYSL, you’re good (the bracket’s going to be all the sketches from the first two seasons pitted against one another, by the way—maybe should have led with that). If you want to, though, go watch it this weekend. Personally, I think it’s a riot, and since many of you who read this blog have a similar sense of humor to me, I’m guessing you might like it too. It’s also the source of approximately 34% of memes on the internet over the last four years, so there’s that. The premise of Tim Robinson, the person, is that he was too weird for SNL. It’s a good start! Maybe he should’ve been in the weirdo bracket.
We’re thinking we’ll release the ITYSL Bracket this weekend, then start voting on it on Monday or Tuesday. It’s all subject to change, though. I didn’t get over to the new place to paint yesterday. I am behind pace on my painting. And don’t get me started on Austin’s curb reservations. I need to either make one of those or find out those are not a thing you can make. You know the thing where they hang up a sign on a tree and there’s a string and then there’s a sign on a parking sign? I want one of those. So our moving truck has space to park out front and we don’t immediately make enemies of ourselves to the neighbors by blocking the alley.
In the meantime, here are the results from The Biggest Weirdo’s first round. Updated brackets are below, but a few thoughts, first:
- You guys think pedophiles are weird. From Gandhi to Michael Jackson to Jared from Subway, pedophiles won their weirdo matchups. This is a relief. It would have been extremely concerning to learn I’d been running a blog for five years that’s mostly read by people who think pedophilia is perfectly normal. Thank God you guys voted those three on. I would have had a crisis.
- You’re not as sold on racism being weird? Hopefully that isn’t the case. Mark Wahlberg lost to Will Smith, and I know Mark Wahlberg’s multiple incidents of racist violence over multiple years happened when he was much younger, but I was expecting more people to think of him as a weird guy. “People can change,” as ITYSL taught us, but it’s weird just *how* racist Wahlberg was. That guy was super racist! Most racists just make coded statements about rap. Mark Wahlberg used to beat people while yelling slurs. It was a hobby of his. Will Smith just slapped a dude for pointing out that his wife is bald. Who among us.
- This is on me, but I don’t really know who Marilyn Manson is, and I have made the mistake before of getting him and Charles Manson confused (I didn’t know Marilyn Manson was named for Charles Manson, which is also on me). Anyway, your stern rebuke of my vote for Ozzy Osbourne has me convinced I need to learn more. I will read Marilyn Manson’s Wikipedia article at some point over the next few days. Maybe even before second round voting tomorrow.
- Oh yeah! The Biggest Weirdo’s second round voting will happen tomorrow. That’s the current plan, at least. We all live fragile lives.
- Nicolas Cage vs. Shia LaBeouf was a heavyweight matchup. I’m sorry about that. Game respects game, though, so I thought those two would enjoy one another.
- I did not plan Kanye vs. Kris Jenner in the second round, I don’t think. I think that was an accident. Pumped, though.
- Matthew McConaughey losing right away, and to only Macaulay Culkin? That’s a bad, bad look for Austin. It’s over, Austin. We are not weird.
- I’m pissed more people don’t think Katy Perry’s weird. She weirds me out. No hate, but I feel uneasy when I see her.
