The NBA Finals start tonight, and if you aren’t sure what those are, you’re probably not alone. For some of us, it takes decades to learn that after players’ NIT or NIT-pursuant careers are finished, they can keep playing basketball, and they’ve evidently been making money at this level for years. The “NBA” is a league of thirty teams made up mostly of players who failed to make the NIT during their college days, willing to take a paycheck while dealing with the terror of seeking existential fulfillment from the sport where they fell short of life’s greatest glory. The “Finals” are this league’s championship series, a best-of-seven competition, like the old CBI championship setup but longer (this is how they get the money to pay the players—colleges evidently could have compensated their labor for years if our forefathers had been directed by God to make the NIT Championship a best-of-seven, but alas, such was not God’s will). Again, most of the players have never sniffed the NIT. But eight of them, by my count, have inhaled it deeply. These are the eight, ranked by their NIT accomplishments:
8. Sam Hauser, Marquette (2018 NIT)
Hauser and the Marquette Golden Eagles only made the quarterfinals in ’18, but that’s still more than most players on the court tonight can say, and Hauser probably won’t even be on the court!
7. Luke Kornet, Vanderbilt (2015 NIT)
Sensing a pattern? The Celtics loaded up their bench with former NIT role players. Who better to help your guys prepare than those who once helped the best of the best prepare? Kornet was also an NIT quarterfinalist, something he’s rumored to dream about every night. Curious how this guy gets any rest with that exhilarating of a memory so present in his head.
6. Damion Lee, Drexel (2012 NIT)
Yet another NIT quarterfinalist role player, but this time on the Warriors. Lee outranks Kornet and Hauser because I put together the database more than a month ago and decided just now to go ahead and rank the guys I labeled “role player” at the time by how surprising it was for their program to make the NIT quarter’s, rather than to go back and parse box scores.
5. Payton Pritchard, Oregon (2018 NIT)
Who knocked out Marquette in 2018? I don’t remember, to be honest. Saint Mary’s? Was that Saint Mary’s? Marquette did knock out Oregon in the game beforehand, if memory serves me correctly. (Fact check: Penn State beat Marquette that year. So Sam Hauser lost to the national champions.) Regardless, Pritchard averaged 19.5 in the tournament, which is more than I’ve ever averaged in the NIT even when I just stand in the driveway of local businesses and count loudly until they tell me they’ve called the cops, then tell myself whatever number I counted to was the equivalent of my NIT scoring average.
4. Steph Curry, Davidson (2009 NIT)
After Curry broke onto the scene with his performance in the 2008 exhibition tournament, he played the big boys in 2009. Lost much more quickly, of course, but he did play against the big boys. 29 points per game, but he was averaging 23 shot attempts.
3. Klay Thompson, Washington State (2009 & 2011 NIT)
One of two players in these Finals to have played in multiple NIT’s, the sharpshooter made an NIT Final Four in ’11 but had a bad game in the semifinals. The brightest lights, and whatnot.
2. Derrick White, Colorado (2017 NIT)
This guy lost to Tacko Fall and dropped 30 points in the process. What a way to go.
1. Juwan Morgan, Indiana (2017 & 2019 NIT)
First, Morgan was part of the legendary 2017 Indiana team which declined a home game out of fear of an angry mob carrying Tom Crean outside the Bloomington City Limits and, once there, tarring and feathering him. Then he carried the 2019 team (the Romeo Langford one) to the quarterfinals in a season in which NIT home games at Assembly Hall were no longer declined.
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What does this mean for the series? I mean, the edge is with the Celtics. They have Derrick White and Juwan Morgan. That’s like Jordan & Pippen if they had accomplished things in college.
Alright, I’m In on the Horns Again
The Texas Longhorns softball team, that is. Great win over UCLA earlier today. Fired up for Saturday. Might even have to cheer against Oklahoma despite my own love of near-perfection (which is why I blog about Joe Kelly and the NIT). This is what living in a college town is supposed to be about in non-football season: Getting really into a team’s run in a semi-money-making-sport way too late. I may not have gotten on the bandwagon, but I am clutching the caboose.
Mason Ramsey Likes the Savannah Bananas
Mason Ramsey shared a reel of the Savannah Bananas last night on his Instagram story (it was a dancing reel, of course), which is yet another shared interest between myself and Mason Ramsey. What a buzz.
The Senators Celebrate Pride Month
In a departure from the Eugene Melnyk era, there is nobody left to get mad at Senators employees for publicly acknowledging/celebrating Pride, which means the logo has a rainbow on Twitter and I don’t know if it had a rainbow last year but people are making it sound like it did not have a rainbow last year and I will not go to the trouble to figure this out because this is largely inconsequential to society as a whole (unlike our other matters of interest for the day, which are crucial to the upkeep of civilization). With other hockey teams still insisting on playing in the playoffs and not letting us sim ahead to the draft, this is the big news of the week out of Ottawa. Good thing, of course, Pride is a good thing, but still: Let us hit the sim button, Tampa Bay. You aren’t the only team in this division, you know.
Fargo’s Off to Camp
We’re traveling this weekend to meet the newest member of The Barking Crow’s extended universe (you have no idea what you’ve been born into, child), so Fargs is headed to boarding. Fingers crossed she doesn’t come home covered in poop and having eaten a shred of blanket like she did that one time. That was rough. Although anything with the phrase “poop-related crimes” does crush it with her Instagram engagement numbers. So…your call, pup. Just be safe, please. Miss you already.
Josh Allen Just Looks Like a Dude
I didn’t watch “The Match” last night, but I did look at a picture, so I will enter the discourse to say: We haven’t gotten to know Josh Allen well enough to full-on recognize him when he’s not wearing Bills stuff. Looks familiar, but we need context. With Patrick Mahomes, it’s hard to recognize him in a hat. Still doesn’t excuse Martin Brundle, though. Paolo Banchero was not wearing a hat that day.
Alexander Rossi to McLaren Confirmed
Ha ha!!!! Settle down, F1 bros. He’s staying in IndyCar. Just moving on from Andretti this offseason, which is important because 1) everyone is clamoring for IndyCar offseason news these days, with the Indy 500 over and the “season” hardly begun, and 2) I had to figure out if Alexander Rossi is any good (bad news on that front for Alexander Rossi, though he did win the Indy 500 in 2016 so he’s set for life in my book and the eyes of God).
Ben Mee: Leaving Burnley?
Well this sucks. The Athletic’s reporting that longtime Burnley captain Ben Mee’s going to leave town this offseason. Great defender, face of the team, seemed like a great dude…the times, as they say, are a-changin’.
To the haters: Burnley was good at not allowing goals, ok? We can all agree on that? Outta here with the hate that was something they were good at.
Hockey!
The Rangers and Lightning did not play seven overtimes last night, or even one. Troubling stuff. It’s almost like they aren’t reading this. Thankfully, the Rangers upheld their patriotic duty. Let’s see if the Oilers can do the same and even things up in the West tonight (I still think the Oilers winning is better for America than the Avalanche winning).
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Viewing schedule tonight:
8:00 PM EDT: Oilers @ Avalanche, TNT (Second Screen)
I don’t trust the Avalanche, and that’s why I assume this Francouz guy is better than Darcy Kuemper. Look out, everybody, but especially the Oilers, great grand hope of America.
8:05 PM EDT: Cardinals @ Cubs, MLB TV
We’ve reached the point where I am excited to see what Christopher Morel does rather than a little scared he’s going to crash land. Reached that point eight weeks ago with Keegan Thompson.
9:00 PM EDT: Celtics @ Warriors, ABC (Second Screen and/or Just Checking in Now and Then)
I will try to keep myself apprised. For the NIT. Not for the NBA.
10:10 PM EDT: Mets @ Dodgers, MLB TV
There is no way the universe lets this be the NLCS, so let’s let the Mets have their moment while it’s here.
