Stu’s Notes: The European NIT Finished Up!

The European NIT finished yesterday, and when I google the championship score, Google shows me fireworks, which is about as lit as lit can get. Eintracht Frankfurt is our new European king, and it looks like the game was fun: It ended in penalties, which were probably penalty kicks but may have been a competition to see who could break the most rules. Also, I think I saw a picture on Twitter of a large ghost in the crowd? The European NIT—fun for dead and alive alike.

Brady Tkachuk Had Fun

After the Cubs game last night, and a bus ride, and a walk to get milk and cookies, and an eating of the milk and cookies, and some scritches for our good friend Jax who is a dog and was also our host, we sat down to watch the third period of Flames/Oilers, and…what can you say? In a 9-6 game, Brady Tkachuk still stole the show from the stands.

A thing about Brady Tkachuk is that he is a manchild and that he is also the most American-Canadian manchild ever despite not actually being Canadian. Another thing about Brady Tkachuk is that he’s only 22? And Matthew Tkachuk is only 24? I did not realize this. I thought they were 27 and 30. We have so many years ahead of us with the Tkachuk brothers, if society holds up as it should. And even if it doesn’t hold up, at least we had nights like last night, with Brady Tkachuk in the stands slamming beers and aping it for the camera while Matthew Tkachuk scored a hat trick and was a general nuisance to all things Edmonton holds holy.

What a family.

Brady’s the better brother, though. At least at hockey. I don’t know about gift-giving or general behavior. I bet Brady’s sweeter but Matthew’s a better all-around guy? Brady seems like he’s got a lot of Eddie Haskell in him sometimes. Although then again, he’s a manchild, and I didn’t realize he’s only 22. I’m going to have to think a think.

Burnley: Not in Bad Shape, But…

Very close to being very close to safety. Instead, Burnley enters Sunday tied with Leeds after a nailbiter of a draw today in…Birmingham? Does Aston Villa play in Birmingham? Is that why Nick Saban was there when he made those comments about Jimbo Fisher?

It was a weird game. Burnley took a lead on a penalty kick, Villa answered right back (after an illegal throw-in but VAR evidently doesn’t look at that and it’s fine it probably didn’t affect the outcome but also one plus one does equal two, and referees didn’t know Everton was pulling yet another win out from between their flapping, floppy butt cheeks up in Evertonland which I think is Liverpool but feels weird to call Liverpool because there’s a team called Liverpool), Burnley then held on in terrifying fashion which included Villa at one point holding on in terrifying fashion themselves and also included Matthew Lowton getting a red card for a rule I evidently don’t understand. Draw. 1-1. Everton moved to safety, it’s just Burnley and Leeds, they are tied in the table but Burnley holds the advantage on goal difference and will not lose that advantage unless the sky falls, and even possibly if the sky falls.

It’s helpful that Leeds is such a shitbag of a soccer team. It’s unhelpful that King Bag himself, Patrick Bamford, probably won’t play against Brentford, because that guy sucks. It’s also unhelpful that Burnley has to play this season’s bogeyman, Newcastle, but maybe they’ll exorcise some demons. And maybe when that’s done Chris Wood will come to his senses and try to return to Burnley under a demonic-possession-specific contract clause even lesser-known than the old buyout.

Would Burnley take him?

That’s a matter for another time.

Joe Kelly Rocked Today

Another scoreless inning for Joe Kelly today, who some are accusing of having found his groove. Are the accusations true? This blogger opines yes.

ToNITe

No, no more European NIT games tonight, guys. Though really, since European NIT bids are determined in part by regular season results, there might be some European NIT action happening. That’s a great thing about the European NIT. It’s kind of eternal, and multiple European NIT’s are happening at once. I think of it like the universe before the Big Bang, all disorderly and perfect, while the NIT is the universe after the Big Bang, all orderly and perfect.

What does happen tonight is that the Cubs play again, and Joe Kelly doesn’t pitch because he already did that, and there are two hockey games (the Avalanche are carpetbagging frauds—remember that) and one basketball game (the Heat mustn’t win it all this year—remember that) and there are other baseball games but not very many because baseball players get tired and they also have to travel and I mean guys, come on, baseball players are human too, and if MLB had figured out how to use non-human players they definitely would be doing that by now, considering how Rob Manfred feels about humanity.

So, we’ve still got a lot going on.

Enjoy it.

Especially if you’re an Eintracht Frankfurt fan (I think there’s a direct flight to Frankfurt from Austin—might have only been a pre-pandemic thing, though, who’s to say).

NIT fan. Joe Kelly expert. Milk drinker. Can be found on Twitter (@nit_stu) and Instagram (@nitstu32).
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