I’m often asked what I do when NIT season is over. The answer, of course, is to wait for the next NIT, but I’ve been known to engage in a few other activities to pass the time. We do try to cover sports as a whole here at The Barking Crow, and because we’re fully independent, we especially cover our favorite teams, both the contrived ones (Burnley, the Ottawa Senators) and the originals (the Cubs, the Bulls, the Packers).
We also cover our favorite athletes.
Err…
My favorite athletes.
Ok, fine.
My favorite athlete.
It was a brisk April night in 2018, and I’d recently returned from my first NIT Final Four. We were still at All Things NIT back then, and as the college basketball offseason began and I prepared to quit my full-time job, it became evident we both needed and wanted to do more than NIT things. The question was: What things should we do?
As it’s said to do, fate had its way that night. Tyler Austin spiked Brock Holt. Joe Kelly drilled Tyler Austin. Joe Kelly kicked Tyler Austin’s ass, coming out of the engagement with his glasses missing, his shirt unbuttoned, and a joke about his control at the ready for the postgame media scrum (“It’s not like I have Greg Maddux command.”)
Side note: I went back and looked at our blog post about that night, and evidently Joe Kelly’s entrance song at that point was a remix of Mason Ramsey yodeling. Did not remember that, but feel much more justified now in including all the Mason Ramsey updates in these notes, something that was originally done because one guy on Twitter said he’d read them every day if we did it.
I was familiar with Joe Kelly already, holding a soft spot for the Red Sox from the Nomar days. I knew there was content there. What I didn’t know was just how much content he’d provide. Over the five years since that April, Joe Kelly has won two World Series (being the best pitcher on the field in one of them), distributed vigilante justice upon the biggest cheaters since the steroid era, written a book, and had a few kids. As for me? I’ve fought the online wars, attended five separate Joe Kelly games just to see Joe Kelly, and flown halfway across the country to attend his bobblehead night.
We aren’t saying you need to be a Joe Kelly fan, or that you need to like the White Sox. Actually, wait. You do need to be a Joe Kelly fan. It’s just the White Sox you don’t have to like. We don’t like the White Sox very much, except as a reliable source of comedy.
We aren’t saying that you need to like the White Sox, but if you’ve enjoyed our NIT coverage and you want something to fill the offseason NIT content gap (there is always offseason NIT content, but there is also always a gap), please: Join us in our Joe Kelly standom. We welcome all kinds. Even Astros fans (we won’t tell).
And so it is that we come to The Barking Crow’s equinox once again. The NIT Championship is tonight (more on that here). Joe Kelly season begins today (more on that below). It’s a beautiful day. A beautiful, beautiful day.
Kelly v. Astros
I’m actually planning to be in Houston this weekend, protesting the illegitimate Final Four, but I don’t think I can make any of the Joe Kelly games. Very small chance we get over there on Sunday, but it’s pretty unlikely. The NIT comes first.
Thankfully, our hero doesn’t need me in attendance to punk the Houston Astros. I haven’t seen the Astros in person in ages, if ever, and he’s punked them for years. (I really should get over there for a game sometime—disappointing that I haven’t done that over four full seasons of me living in Austin.) This evening’s trick? Well, Rob Manfred played a little joke on our guy and made the White Sox go to Houston for the Astros’ banner raising, but the joke is on the Astros, and specifically the way too many Astros fans who are so obsessed with Joe Kelly that they can’t enjoy anything while he’s in the building. They’ll be so busy watching to see if he makes a face at them again that they won’t even see the banner. It’s perfect. It’s absolutely perfect.
Pat Bev Got Too Small-ed
We were saying that the Bulls had nothing to lose against the Lakers, because LeBron James is LeBron James and Pat Beverley is Pat Beverley, but then Austin Reaves hit Pat Bev with the too small, and we’re big enough to admit the following: Austin Reaves got us. He got us good.
Sens Watch
The Sens did not get good results last night, with the Panthers and Islanders both winning and the Capitals picking up an overtime point. We’re in a situation where I’m asking if winning out would be enough for the Sens to make the playoffs, and that’s not a good situation to be in.
The guys play the Flyers tonight, and I don’t know anything beyond that but I see that the Panthers are in Montreal (letdown game) and the Penguins host the Predators (Preds are about to get hot), so it’s not out of the question that the Sens could get within three points. Three isn’t that many, right? With seven to play? Tell me it isn’t too many, somebody. Somebody who knows hockey, please. Please help me.
The Chicago Cubs
The Cubs are about to start, and I couldn’t find an outlet in the sportsbook at the hotel, which is a bummer but is also on me. Joe keeps saying it’s going to be a bad season, and I believe Joe. Hopefully Craig Counsell doesn’t do anything too weaselly. I’d hate to have to remind everyone on The Internet of how lame the Brewers are and lose myself all the Wisconsin goodwill I’ve accumulated these last few weeks.
One Last NIT Championship Thought
Before we go out there toNITe, one thing:
There are no NIT games after this one. This is the final NIT game of 2023. There is no need to pace ourselves. There is no need to be measured. We can leave it all on the floor tonight, friends, and leave it on the floor we shall.
