“How do you throw a sinker 98 mph?” a friend asked.
“With your balls,” came the response.
Joe Kelly was extraordinary last night, and I use a lot of words lightly when it comes to Joe Kelly but I must stress that this was a great outing. Strikeout. Flyout. Groundball. Groundball. Tapper he took care of himself. Routinely touching 99 on the radar gun, with the knuckle curve dancing and diving and at one point even dare I say wobbling on its way to break Guardian hearts. And speaking of hearts, the only thing moving faster than that sinker was the collective heartbeat of every Chicagoan, near and far. Because in that seventh inning, as Joe Kelly stepped back onto the Midwestern scene, the whole city knew it: Something special was happening on the South Side.
A few other things of note from the appearance:
- The White Sox lost? Concerning for them. If your bullpen can’t hold a lead with the best athlete in human history as part of itself, you’re in trouble.
- The City Connect jersey, as expected, looks particularly good on Joe Kelly. Wonder if they made it with him in mind. Tampering?
- Twelve strikes, seven balls, only one pitch that almost hit a guy.
- The second hit was a split second from being an error on Tim Anderson. Not to hate on Tim Anderson, just to point out that Joe Kelly picked his guy up on the next hitter.
Does our guy go again tonight? It seems unlikely, but stranger things have happened. We’ll keep an eye on it, though our focus will remain on Wednesday afternoon.
Other matters of grave import:
The NHL Lottery Is Tonight
Sorry guys, not as exciting as you’d hoped. Rather than handing out money (or the whole NHL, which would be a lottery I’d enter), they’re just giving out draft position. Per Tankathon, the Sens have a 6.5% chance of getting the first pick, a 6.9% chance of nabbing the second, a 44.4% chance of drafting seventh, 36.5% chance of drafting eighth, and 5.6% chance of drafting ninth. I should stress that they cannot get both the first and second picks, even though that would be fun and good and neat. Also, I forgot the Red Wings finished ahead of our guys in the standings. Feels kind of nice now.
Sweatin’ Out the Burnleys
More on this in the morning (perhaps even a little later today or tonight), we hesitantly plan, but Leeds hosts Chelsea and Everton visits Watford tomorrow in games-that-could-determine-the-entire-future-of-Burnley-F.C.
In other news, Matěj Vydra ruptured something the Brits are calling his “cruciate ligament” that I think is his ACL. Evidently did it against Watford and kept going. I have a lot of questions and a lot of awe. James Tarkowski had a scan on his hamstring yesterday, which I assume means an MRI but do they have those in England and if so do they work even with England having all those magnets lying around? Lot of questions, not as much awe here. Not that I think Tarkowski (or England) is soft or anything (just highly magnetic—England, not Tarkowski). Just, you know, he didn’t have a season-altering assist with a partially torn ACL. (Partial tear, right? Or is Matěj Vydra superhuman?)
Fargo’s Itchy
If anyone has recommendations on how to get a dog to stop ferociously biting herself because her skin itches from what we assume is seasonal allergies (similar thing happened last year), please let us know. We’ve been trying Benadryl, and I think it’s helping, but it isn’t helping enough. I do have a tab open on my phone with suggestions but the second thing involved checking for fleas and ticks and that reminded me she was due for her preventative flea & tick medication, so I got distracted and went and gave her the flea & tick medication. Maybe there’s some wisdom on The Internet™.
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Viewing schedule this evening:
6:30 PM EDT: NHL Draft Lottery (ESPN)
Low time investment, potential high memory value. Also, I want to check out Gary Bettman’s vibes. It has been a long time since I’ve seen him speak. Is he shaken?
7:00 PM EDT: Bruins @ Hurricanes (ESPN)
Well, I’m already gonna be in a hockey mood, and this is not the series where the two teams are most likely to kill one another (that’s Flames/Stars, as you’d hope with names as cosmically powerful as those), but there’s still high chaos potential and whatever happens in that arena in Raleigh feels like a good thing to be aware of in case it ever gets out of hand and we have to disavow it.
7:30 PM EDT: 76ers @ Heat (TNT, second screen)
Nobody ever talks about how Paul Millsap dropped 19 points in Louisiana Tech’s 2006 NIT first round loss.
8:10 PM EDT: Guardians @ White Sox (Regional TV, just gamecast unless It’s Time™)
Can you imagine what it would do for the city of Chicago if Joe Kelly threw two scoreless innings there in two days?
9:40 PM EDT: Cubs @ Padres (Regional TV)
Dare I hope for two good games in a row? Dare I dream? Dare I look at Frank Schwindel’s fallen face?
10:00 PM EDT: Kings @ Oilers (ESPN2, second screen)
This series feels higher-scoring than it is.
