One of my fantasy football leagues (Matthew Stafford and Friends, now in its seventh year) is run on GroupMe and a Google spreadsheet, and sometimes this creates confusion. For example: This week my buddy Clay listed “alvimopan” as one of his running backs, right in between “Carr you going to the mall later” at QB and “very Terry dingleberry” in the flex slot. I’m pretty sure he meant Alvin Kamara, because the other running backs it could be are A.J. Dillon, Chase Edmonds, Clyde Edwards-Helaire, and David Montgomery (six-team league, rosters are deep), and none of those have names starting with “alv.” Also, none of them are pharmaceutical products used to assist gastrointestinal recovery during hospitalization.
So, if any of you guys know who else he might be referring to, let me know. He’s a man of honor, so I can ask him, but I don’t want to get embarrassed in the chat if it turns out A.J. Dillon’s been going as Alvimopan and I’ve been out of the loop.
Burnley Blew It
They keep doing this.
After leading 1-0 for most of the second half, the lads let Cardiff score, which turned three points into one and one happy Stu into zero happy Stus.
It was another one where Burnley didn’t necessarily deserve to win, but coughing it up was a bummer nevertheless. Still looking play-off-bound (that’s how the British spell “playoff-bound”), but would be nice to be up with Norwich and Sheffield United. Especially with Watford getting their shit together a little bit. Four points off the pace, about a quarter of the way through the season.
Texas Might Win the Big 12
Are we back in? No. I swear! But we think the Big 12 might be really bad. It’s either that or it’s really good, right? I guess maybe it’s somewhere in between. I suppose everyone beating everyone else doesn’t really show how good or bad any individual team is.
Housekeeping
We’ll catch up on all the other things tomorrow. I’m a little sleepy today and it is already, quite literally, the afternoon.
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Viewing schedule for today:
4:25 PM EDT: Patriots @ Packers (CBS)
Do you think Aaron Rodgers and Bill Belichick text each other memes making fun of Tom Brady? I want to see a meme Bill Belichick loves. One that he shows his dog.
2:20 PM EDT: Reds @ Cubs (MLB TV)
If the Cubs win, they guarantee their loss total will be in the eighties this year. That’s good territory. That’s territory that makes people think you’re going to make the next step next year, but in the way where they don’t say who’ll step backwards to make that possible so they accidentally imply that twenty teams are going to make the playoffs.
4:10 PM EDT: White Sox @ Padres (MLB TV)
Joe Kelly struck out more batters yesterday, doing enough to get his xERA down to a career best, which means now all three of his FIP, xERA, and strikeout rate are at their peaks. Based on this, I think we’ve found our three most important stats in baseball, everybody.
7:00 PM EDT: Mets @ Braves (ESPN)
It would be very Mets to get swept in a series where they only needed to win one game to win the division. Also, this should be a good game.
8:00 AM EDT: F1 Singapore Grand Prix (ESPN2)
2:00 PM EDT: YellaWood 500 – NASCAR Cup Series at Talladega (NBC)
The Singapore race at least looks cool, and there’s some good chaos potential there, even if it’ll end with either Max Verstappen winning or a farce of a race. For NASCAR, the question at this point is how many drivers will get their brains bashed in by these new cars. Which is a shame, because races at Talladega should be the most fun.
