The Gay Mets are here.
The Gay Mets have swagger.
The Gay Mets are winning baseball games.
The thing about the Mets is that this is still the team Steve Cohen paid so much money to assemble a year and a half ago. It’s not the exact same—Max Scherzer and Justin Verlander are in Texas now, others are hurt or have likewise moved on—but the frame of the team is the same. Francisco Lindor. Brandon Nimmo. Pete Alonso. Edwin Díaz. The Mets are no longer an on-paper juggernaut, but they’re not bad in and of their players. When they’re bad, they’re bad because they’re the Mets.
The thing about the Gay Mets is that they’re not the Mets. They’re the Gay Mets. And the Gay Mets, led by McDonald’s mascot Grimace (evidently a gay icon despite being of ambiguous sexuality himself), are good at baseball. This week, they took two of three from the Straight Rangers, co-opting Texas’s Creed-singing mariachi band for their own purposes along the way. Last weekend, they swept the Padres. This weekend, they’re visiting Wrigley Field, and I—as a Cubs fan—am terrified of what they might do.
What is happening, you ask?
The sparknotes concerning this situation are these:
In honor of Pride Month, the Mets changed their logo on social media to a rainbow-colored version of itself. Possibly also in honor of Pride Month (I’m guessing this was not the impetus but it sure would be funny), they had Grimace throw out a first pitch before a game. From there, they started winning baseball games, something the Mets are not customarily known to do. Clearly, these were not the same old Mets. These were something new. And The Internet™ caught on. The Gay Mets were born, and the rest may one day be history.
Ten days from the end of Pride Month, questions abound for this team’s future. Will the Gay Mets expire with the end of June? If so, will they return to being the Mets, or will they become something new, like the Disabled Mets? Are any of the Gay Mets gay? Is it appropriation if a baseball team becomes gay just so it can finally win some games?
I have no answers. I have only a strong feeling of dread. The Gay Mets are coming to Chicago. Godspeed to the Cubs.
Etc.
- Texas A&M and Tennessee are into the College World Series Finals, and this is not the arena in which I expected these two to consolidate power. I thought it would be something much goofier. Specifically, these guys rank first and second in our privately maintained rankings of university communities most likely to pull a Waco.* Now that I think about it, I suppose it’s possible the fanbases could pull a Waco at Charles Schwab Field? Oh no. Oh no oh no oh no. Has college baseball’s growth been a setup by the FBI?
- Speaking of sporting events featuring fanbases liable to descend into riot, Euro 2024 has seen complaints between Serbia, Croatia, Albania, and Kosovo. And Kosovo’s not even in the tournament! What’s going on? Well. Some of it’s ongoing territorial disputes rooted in severe ethnoreligious tension and a history of genocide. Specifically the Serbia–Kosovo part. But some is just rivalry. These guys don’t like each other. I get the sense that global powers could carve former Yugoslavia and the rest of the Balkans up into perfectly shaped countries, countries where nobody has to live with anyone they hate, and the hate would persist. Peace might be achievable. But that doesn’t mean fans won’t chant vile things at the Euros.
- The NCAA had another meeting about expanding the NCAA T*urnament, so let us reiterate: We fully support changing the number of teams involved, and we think the ideal number is zero.
*Baylor is down in the 50’s right now. I don’t know if this strains or strengthens town/gown relations.
