There’s a rumor going around that Aaron Rodgers doesn’t want to play quarterback for the Packers, and let me just say…I don’t want to play quarterback for the Packers either.
I would get hurt.
I would do badly.
I would bring shame upon myself and my people (the NIT blogging industry, mainly).
I’m not quite six feet tall. I’m a little over 200 pounds. At my fittest, I weighed something like 190 pounds, and I’d venture a guess that I’ve lost muscle since then, meaning I am a little bit flabby. And while that might provide some sort of cushion, I also have stiff hips and I get back spasms a lot, both of which are things that cast doubt upon my ability to avoid getting literally killed by a linebacker blitzing from the edge.
I also don’t want to let the Packers down. What if they expected me to do well? I consider myself a decent pickup quarterback, but my most recent performance came nearly five years ago, when I was 22, and it came both with and against a bunch of high school cross country runners, with the opposing quarterback a half-blind math teacher in his 40’s. I don’t think we were playing with an NFL-sized ball. I’m not sure I can palm an NFL-sized ball. Not when it’s cold. My fingers are kind of stubby, and the NFL didn’t take it too well the last time someone deflated a football in the name of grip.
If I did survive, and just play terribly, I think it would get old fast, especially for Packers fans. They wouldn’t like me. Other fans might like me, but mostly as a joke. I’d be well-set financially, I’d imagine, but there’s a great chance I’d get concussed, and CTE freaks me out. Can’t put a price on avoiding CTE.
So, yeah. No Packers for me. But thanks for asking.
