You read the title of this, right?
Ok, cool, so you know what’s going on.
The Balls
Every year, Rawlings sends the MLB 3,000 baseballs specially made for the Home Run Derby.
One of them is full of gunpowder, as well as a device that will make a spark when the ball is struck. Nobody will be injured if this ball is hit, but there will be a small explosion that will look very cool and prove startling to all involved.
The Field
Progressive Field isn’t as progressive as it claims to be, but few of us are. We’ll allow it.
The Competitors
There are nine of these, but one of them only gets to hit if he can escape the half-nelson that Torey Lovullo has him in back in the clubhouse. We rarely see number nine. This year, it’s Sammy Sosa.
The Non-Competitor
Christian Yelich’s “back problems” are actually just insecurity regarding his derrière resulting from him misunderstanding a comment Josh Bell made in his direction over the weekend.
Back to the competitors
Matt Chapman
Matt Chapman does not know who killed JFK. Please stop asking him.
Vladimir Guerrero Jr.
When Vladimir Guerrero Jr. was nine years old, he told a bicycle repair man that if he ever won the home run derby, he would break every bike in Albany and pay the man to fix all of them. He also said he would cover the man’s travel expenses, food, and lodging.
Alex Bregman
Alex Bregman’s grandfather was a chef aboard the Titanic.
Joc Pederson
Joc Pederson would really prefer to wear Reebok batting gloves, but he’s worried his teammates would make fun of him.
Pete Alonso
Pete Alonso has never heard of Italy.
Carlos Santana
Carlos Santana is a Mexican and American guitarist who rose to fame in the late 1960s and early 1970s with his band, Santana, which pioneered a fusion of rock and roll and Latin American jazz. Wikipedia
Born: July 20, 1947 (age 71 years), Autlán, Mexico
Spouse: Cindy Blackman (m. 2010), Deborah Santana (m. 1973-2007)
Josh Bell
Did you know Josh Bell likes tying his shoes so much Clint Hurdle sometimes has to threaten to cut off the laces if he won’t stop tying them and go bat?
Ronald Acuña Jr.
Ronald Acuña Jr. thinks the world would be a better place if Portugal and the Philippines traded spots. He might be on to something.
***
Well that was fun. See you guys tomorrow.
