Trevor Bauer is a Dodger. This is good for the Dodgers. Bauer, within the “rules” Major League Baseball has established regarding foreign substances and the baseball, is a highly effective pitcher. He should make a lot of starts for Los Angeles, setting up Joe Kelly to work his magic in the most important moments of the game before handing it off to…I’m assuming still Kenley Jansen?…for bedtime.
But it could be great for Trevor Bauer.
Bauer has the tools to do well on most major league rosters. But not every major league roster can help him achieve his real goal, which is to be cool.
Trevor Bauer has been trying to be cool for years now. It’s an admirable effort. He’s got that Momentum YouTube channel. He did the Free Joe Kelly cleats. He lets his personality through on Twitter.
The problem is that his personality is one of someone trying to be cool. Not someone being cool.
Bauer is, to sum him up for those whose baseball fandom is strictly limited to Joe Kelly’s orbit, a guy who engineered himself to be one of the best pitchers in the game. He pushed revolutionary stuff in the realm of what’s effectively pitching R&D. He’s highly intelligent. He’s highly willing to break norms. But he often seems to lack a medium amount of self-awareness and a medium amount of social awareness. He doesn’t totally lack these things. That would be way more fun. He lacks the medium amount of them. His content doesn’t click, and I say that as a guy who’s put out a lot of content that didn’t click. There’s some cringing when watching his stuff or watching him tweet, or at least some sense of unease. I’m familiar with causing that sense. When you make content, I think you kind of have to go through that to find your groove. I’m going through that right now on TikTok.
Trevor Bauer doesn’t need to be Kyle Hendricks—a silent assassin, using his brain but only using it behind the scenes. That would not be authentic to Bauer. But Bauer also can’t be Derek Jeter, or Fernando Tatís Jr., or even Dan Haren, capable of being effortlessly likable. At his best, Bauer’s geeking out over drones, talking spin rate, and mf-ing Rob Manfred with clarity and structurally sound arguments. At his worst, he’s releasing a hype video for his own free agency signing that just misses the mark.
Which is where Joe Kelly, once again, comes in.
Joe Kelly probably won’t teach Trevor Bauer about pitching. Bauer, as we’ve established, engineering himself as a pitcher. Joe Kelly was engineered by nature. While Bauer long tosses from foul pole to foul pole, Joe Kelly just throws hard. While Bauer studies the physics of a baseball’s rotation, Joe Kelly just has nasty stuff. While Bauer calculates the best way to get in hitters’ heads, Joe Kelly takes the mound wild-eyed and lets the spirit move him.
But Joe Kelly can teach a lot to Trevor Bauer about being cool. Because Joe Kelly is very, very cool.
What will he teach the guy? Far be it from me to say. I’m not the expert.
But it’ll probably be something like, “Hey, buddy. Do a little less. Be yourself. Now hold this bag open for me while I find all the Happy Meal toys David Price left in it.”
