Burnley F.C. is taking the Disco Inferno on the road today, the seventh-place Clarets trying to stay within two points of the fourth-place Leicester’s with one of those #roaddraws.
One of the biggest questions entering the game is who all plays for Burnley. I’ve internalized the name Ashley Barnes. I’ve not internalized any other names. So let’s do a little roll call:
The Keeper
British for “Goalie,” the Keeper’s the dude who stands in the net. Nick Pope’s his name. No idea how good or bad he is but let’s keep an eye on him.
The Wingman
Not a technical term, but it turns out another man named Ashley, this one a “Midfielder,” has multiple assists on the year and led the club in that realm last season.
The Sidekick
A New Zealander, Chris Wood’s got three goals on the year, second only to our man Ashley’s four.
The Coolest Name
Just look at this name (he’s only played in four matches this year and I don’t know whether he’s a sub or not, but he’s scored once):
Ashley Barnes
We know him. We think he’s good because he scores the most. We didn’t know he was Austrian, but now we know that too—useful if we ever look at an international contest.
Ok, out of time. They’re already kicking the ball around. Gotta go watch (I’m not going to watch I don’t even know if that’s possible without subjecting my computer to an illegal stream—probably going to keep the little Google tracker up on a tab, though).
Burn, baby. Burnley.
