First, great news: Our country is in safe hands. Joe Kelly will NOT be retiring this offseason. He’s coming back. More highlights from his latest interview on Baseball Isn’t Boring (go listen; Rob Bradford’s a good dude):
- In an ideal world, Joe Kelly would like to retire, do a bunch of anabolic steroids, and then come back throwing 109 mph while weighing 215 lbs. This world is not that ideal one. He’s coming back sans PEDs.
- All Joe Kelly really wants from his son Knox’s 9U tackle football career* is this: “I want my nine-year-old to fricking run through another nine-year-old and make that little bastard cry.”
- Joe Kelly missed Mookie Betts’s post-parade party because Knox’s team had a walk-through ahead of Sunday’s Super Bowl. Family man.
- The Yankees were talking a lot of shit during Game 3. (Bradford reported this. Joe Kelly didn’t know about it. He was in the bullpen.)
- Joe Kelly doesn’t think highly of the Yankees.
This last part is what’s getting all the headlines today, but it’s also exactly what Yankee fans said about the Yankees? I think everyone’s in agreement that the Yankees played terrible baseball in the World Series and underperformed their talent. I’m not sure why any Yankees fans are upset by Joe Kelly saying the same thing they’re saying. If anything, Yankees fans could be mad about Joe Kelly implying that the Yankees’ superstars are lazy and don’t care. But even that isn’t anything Brian Cashman didn’t already imply about Giancarlo Stanton last offseason. Clean up your own house, Yankees fans. Joe Kelly and Dave Roberts are your daddies, and that does not give you permission to backtalk them.
*“None of that weak-ass flag shit.”
**“We have a lot of big superstars in our clubhouse, but the superstars also care and aren’t lazy.”
