It’s over.
“Semi-Charmed Life” by Third Eye Blind defeats “All the Small Things” by Blink-182, 58-50
Instagram: Semi-Charmed Life 30, All the Small Things 29
Twitter: Semi-Charmed Life 14, All the Small Things 12
Google Form: Semi-Charmed Life 14, All the Small Things 9
Yes, Semi-Charmed Life is your 90’s Bangers Bracket champion.
It was, to be sure, a thrilling tournament, and there were no real losers, except for, you know, the 63 songs that lost. (Did you think I was going to go with the Beck joke? I considered it.) We thank all of you, the voters, for your passion these last two weeks. There’s no way to measure this, but we’d say this tournament had the most heart of any we’ve undertaken since lockdowns began.
One thing we can measure is The People’s Rankings. If you’re new here, these are just rankings derived from vote counts using this process:
- Take the champion (Semi-Charmed Life) and assign it a score of 100.
- For every song which lost to Semi-Charmed Life, calculate its score using ‘Score = 100 – M,’ where M is the margin of defeat, in percentage points.
- For every song which lost to a song which lost to Semi-Charmed Life, calculate its score using ‘Score = Opponent’s Score – M/Opponent’s Score.’ Continue this for all the songs until every song has a score.
Obviously, not a perfect way to measure how these would stack up in a collective ranking, because votes are binary and don’t account for enthusiasm, but it’s the best we can do.
1. “Semi-Charmed Life” by Third Eye Blind (100.0)
2. “All the Small Things” by Blink-182 (92.6)
3. “I Want It That Way” by the Backstreet Boys (77.4)
4. “Closing Time” by Semisonic (76.2)
5. “…Baby One More Time” by Britney Spears (70.5)
6. “All Star” by Smash Mouth (65.5)
7. “Wonderwall” by Oasis (65.3)
8. “What’s My Age Again?” by Blink-182 (62.8)
9. “Tubthumping” by Chumbawamba (61.9)
10. “Ironic” by Alanis Morissette (61.3)
11. “Only Wanna Be with You” by Hootie & the Blowfish (60.71)
12. “Mr. Jones” by Counting Crows (60.66)
13. “Man! I Feel Like a Woman!” by Shania Twain (60.1)
14. “Friends in Low Places” by Garth Brooks (58.2)
T-15. “Smells Like Teen Spirit” by Nirvana (55.6)
T-15. “Jumper” by Third Eye Blind (55.6)
17. “You Oughta Know” by Alanis Morissette (53.5)
18. “My Heart Will Go On” by Celine Dion (51.8)
19. “Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)” by Green Day (51.7)
20. “Slide” by the Goo Goo Dolls (51.1)
21. “Iris” by the Goo Goo Dolls (51.0)
22. “Wannabe” by the Spice Girls (50.3)
23. “Waterfalls” by TLC (49.7)
24. “3 A.M.” by Matchbox 20 (49.5)
25. “Jump Around” by House of Pain (48.5)
26. “Californication” by the Red Hot Chili Peppers (47.2)
27. “California Love” by 2Pac (46.7)
28. “Save Tonight” by Eagle-Eye Cherry (46.6)
29. “Losing My Religion” by R.E.M. (46.5)
30. “Party Up (Up In Here)” by DMX (46.2)
31. “No Scrubs” by TLC (44.8)
32. “Breakfast at Tiffany’s” by Deep Blue Something (43.7)
33. “Mambo No. 5 (A Little Bit of…)” by Lou Bega (43.53)
34. “Santeria” by Sublime (43.46)
35. “Everybody” by the Backstreet Boys (43.0)
36. “Gettin’ Jiggy Wit It” by Will Smith (42.0)
37. “I Will Always Love You” by Whitney Houston (40.902)
38. “No Diggity” by Blackstreet (40.896)
39. “One Week” by Barenaked Ladies (40.8)
40. “MMMBop” by Hanson (40.7)
41. “This Is How We Do It” by Montell Jordan (40.3)
42. “Everlong” by the Foo Fighters (39.8)
43. “My Own Worst Enemy” by Lit (39.65)
44. “Zombie” by the Cranberries (39.59)
45. “Baby Got Back” by Sir Mix-A-Lot (39.3)
46. “Blue (Da Ba Dee)” by Eiffel 65 (39.2)
47. “Kiss Me” by Sixpence None the Richer (37.9)
48. “Loser” by Beck (37.5)
49. “My Name Is” by Eminem (37.4)
50. “Basket Case” by Green Day (35.6)
51. “What I Got” by Sublime (35.4)
52. “Livin’ La Vida Loca” by Ricky Martin (35.0)
53. “Every Morning” by Sugar Ray (34.9)
54. “If It Makes You Happy” by Sheryl Crow (34.4)
55. “Don’t Speak” by No Doubt (34.3)
56. “Say My Name” by Destiny’s Child (33.2)
57. “Barbie Girl” by Aqua (32.9)
58. “Gangsta’s Paradise” by Coolio (31.4)
59. “Champagne Supernova” by Oasis (31.1)
60. “I Want You Back” by NSYNC (29.9)
61. “I’ll Make Love to You” by Boyz II Men (28.2)
62. “Pretty Fly (For a White Guy)” by The Offspring (27.4)
63. “Torn” by Natalie Imbruglia (25.9)
64. “Creep” by TLC (25.4)
There will be another tournament soon. Stay tuned.
