This is Fargo.
Fargo has some things to say.
mmmmmmmhheeeeLLLOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
*the stomping of stomps, the wagging of wags, a jump on your shoulders for good measure, a boop, another boop, and now all the licks yes all of the licks the puppy is giving you all the puppy kisses*
*sits, with a sense of urgency*
*taps you with her paw to ask for pets*
wow. what a day. you and me, friend, making sure i get petted. what more is there to life than this.
i will tell you what more there is. we have an URGENT manner to attend to.
i have been accused, on the interwebs, of poop-based crimes.
i have ALLEGEDLY rolled in poop. i have ALLEGEDLY eaten some poop. i have ALLEGEDLY barfed up poop in the back seat of a moving vehicle. i ALLEGEDLY required three baths over the first two days of this week from the kind people at daycare.
my response:
I AM A DOG.
what do you expect, humans? you think you can get away with treating me like a person (a half person, i might add, you have been mighty stingy with the turkey lately) and not have me come back and remind you that I AM A DOG?!?!?!?
if you wanted something that would not eat poop, you should have gotten a different animal. like a human child. but i am a puppy. and if the raw-food dogs in the pack poop, i’m getting that fresh (minus the digestion) chicken in my mouth. and then on your backseat.
also it’s going to give me diarrhea just a forewarning.
