This is Fargo.
Fargo has something to say.
mmmmheeeEEEELLLLOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*sashaying, mostly, but in the most violent way you have ever seen an excited being sashay, like someone implanted a swing in her heinie*
why yes, it was my birthday the other day, how did you know, thank you ever so much for mentioning it, yes i will gladly accept the pets and the scritches and perhaps we could hold hands for a moment and yes do you mind if i give you little licks upon your nose i would like to give you little licks upon your nose.
NOW.
someone took the chips.
I KNOW!
for my walks the last six days, i have been massively enjoying the pile of barf that is slowly wasting away under the tree out in front of my building (it is MY building and i will growl at all who walk its halls when i can’t see them and thus cannot solicit pets from them as a hallway toll). thankfully, it is still there. BECAUSE THE CHIPS ARE GONE. i had also been enjoying the chips in front of the taco place down the street. tostadas, i believe. salty. fun to lick. fun to cronch as well, i would assume, but cronching is a good way to draw attention to yourself and all week i was getting away with licks so i did not try to cronch.
BUT THEN THIS MORNING THEY WERE GONE
oh golly, oh heck, it was a disaster. i was sniffing and sniffing and sniffing some more but the chips were simply not there. i looked at the human, asking him why (i assume he took the chips, he is usually the one taking fun things away from me, things such as shoes and rugs and the dead squirrel that one time which he just HAD to HAVE). he had no answer. he cannot answer for his crimes. MAYBE PUT HIM IN THE CAGE TONIGHT AND LET ME SLEEP UPON THE BED HMM JUST A SUGGESTION SEEMS PRETTY FAIR TO ME.
anyhoo, no chips left on the sidewalk. thank goodness i have a new best friend in the form of the squeaky rabbit we picked up from petco on wednesday to keep me company in my sorrows. thank everloving heck for that.
